vendredi 30 septembre 2016

I don't need...

I feel as though a shift is occurring.  I really do.

People and things have come into my life lately that have changed how I look at the world.  Inspiring words said half by accident (and through the most surprising of mediums) have made a huge difference to me (you may or may not know who you are - but thanks).

Apparently an important new moon is happening tonight.  I don't know how much I believe in these things but I don't think it matters.  It's about setting intentions.  It all seems to have come at once, a cosmic pile-up, just at exactly the right time.

I'm deciding to take this as an opportunity.  I'm going to mark the occasion with crystals and burning things and good intentions, but that's not the important stuff.  I think some important stuff might actually stay with me way beyond this new moon.  I genuinely believe the universe is telling me something right now.  Whether it really is or not is completely beside the point.  We're all doing our best.  I don't want to control the world or anyone in it.  I don't even need answers.

I have made so many lists in the last few days.  Of the things I need in my life and the things I need to do to get them and make them so.  From travel to hats to new knickers to morning pages.  Dance classes, cooking for others, records and fires.  Getting outdoors.  Doing the stuff I am here to do.

Tonight I'll mostly be burning sage and listening to Patti Smith, I think.  Happy new moon.


P.S. I have the inner sleeve of this record framed on my bedroom wall.  It has Patti in a white dress and the Rilke quote 'For one human being to love another, that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the work for which all other work is but preparation' - which I suppose about sums it up.

Also, I just found this article, which is a pretty interesting read on the topic: http://articles.latimes.com/1988-07-24/entertainment/ca-10323_1_patti-smith 

(Because whatever anyone says, Patti and Fred will always be my ultimate relationship goal.)

jeudi 29 septembre 2016

Pointless

One of those days when there are so many things I could and should be doing… and so I’m not.  Instead, a spiralling black hole of Google.

It started with going through some old photos, and finding one of myself – with a black bowl cut, jetlagged early morning eyeliner and the last remnants of a former baby face – on the balcony of my room at the Chelsea Hotel, over six years ago (go see me on Instagram at @eleanorclairewood if you’re interested!).  Not so many years in the grand scheme of things, but SO long ago!  It blows my mind to think of how much has happened since then.  This funny old life.

So, then I had to go and listen to Chelsea Girls by Nico…

…Then I spent a lot of time reading facts and stories I already knew about Nico.

That got me onto John Cooper Clarke, which is always a fun way to while away the hours.  Actually, this was well worth doing because it taught me a new fact that has delighted me beyond all reasonable measure.

OK, did you know (and I sincerely hope this surprises you as much as it did me)..?

John Cooper Clarke was once on a celebrity edition of the (brilliant) quiz show Pointless.  Seriously delightful as well as surprising.  I will doubtless spend this evening trawling the internet for that episode.  I’ll keep you posted on how this important mission goes, obviously.

And of course JCC sets off mental sparks of all those rooster-haired, twiggy-legged boys I love the best and the black hole continues.  I may never emerge.


It’s not pointless.  It never is.  I hope I’m absorbing good things and they’ll come out somehow.  Plans afoot.  Procrastinating is part of the process, right?

jeudi 15 septembre 2016

Where you see a wall, I see a door.

Sometimes I swear I even bore myself.  I'm moody and always over-reacting.  I'm an expert in taking things the wrong way.  I say one thing when I mean another.

I say other people's dreams are boring, then I insist upon recounting my own - my dream life is INSANE lately.

I have posted this song/video a few times before - both quite recently and as far back as 2013.  But I love it and it is so often appropriate.  Plus, I had a dream last night that I was in a car, driving to the sea and singing this at the top of my lungs.  It's where I wish I was right now.


mardi 13 septembre 2016

Roald Dahl Day

You don't need me to talk about Roald Dahl.  You really don't.  Everyone's doing it.  Always, all over the place.  Especially today, obviously.  Everyone loves Roald Dahl.  Obviously.

Neither do you need me to shove one of his most famous quotes under your nose.  You really don't.  You already know it.  Obviously.

But I'm going to anyway.

Because it's perfect and brilliant and I want to remind myself of it and apply it to my life every single fucking day.  Especially today.


"I began to realise how important it is to be an enthusiast in life.  If you are interested in something, no matter what it is, go at it full speed.

Embrace it with both arms, hug it, love it and above all become passionate about it.

LUKEWARM IS NO GOOD."


It applies to everything you can possibly think of.  Career, creativity, friendships, romance, food (literally and figuratively - ha!).  Everything.

I never, ever want to be lukewarm.  LUKEWARM IS NO GOOD.  I want to be a staunch enthusiast, always.

lundi 12 septembre 2016

A room that is not my own.

Other people’s dreams are so boring. However, for some reason I feel the need to recount mine from last night.

I was in my old flat – my first Brighton flat, in fact.  The one high up in the middle of the Lanes.  A lovely (not to mention big and cheap) flat where I was so happy.

But it wasn’t my flat.  Apparently it was Virginia Woolf’s.  A tour guide told me so.

‘But that’s my writing table,’ I said.

‘No it’s not.  It’s Virginia Woolf’s.’

On a shelf cluttered with all of my things (‘Virginia Woolf’s things, actually’) I kept spotting objects that I had lost.  Relics from my past.  And I kept being told they weren’t mine.  They were Virginia’s.

I spotted a favourite necklace – one I used to wear every day, until the day I lost it when I was trying on bridesmaid’s dresses for Louise’s wedding.  I loved that necklace so much; when I discovered it was missing, I spent hours ringing around trying to establish where it might be and if someone had found it – to no avail.

I’m an overly superstitious person.  It was one of those moments in my life that felt like a bad omen.  Losing one of my lucky charms.  Like that time the glass horse fell off the shelf and broke – I knew it meant something terrible.  And it did.

I grabbed the necklace and made a run for it.  I woke up, panicked, in bed with my mum’s dog.  It took me a moment to remember where I was, not at home.

Maybe it’s not a sign.  Maybe I’m just bored on a Monday morning and that’s why I’m Googling ‘dream of lost object’ and ‘finding lost things in a dream’.  It’s confusing me – finding lost object (good!), only to be told it’s not really mine.  Maybe that’s the point.  I like to give everything a neat narrative that maybe it doesn't have.  Lesson?  Yeah.


Finding an item you've lost can mean you're feeling you've regained something you've lost in real life (a relationship, happiness, source of income, etc.), or that you'd like to regain it.

Finding Something – If you dream about finding something, this is a sign that you will soon make an important discovery. This may be a missing piece of information that you have been struggling without, or it may be a new discovery that will prove pivotal in some way. If you dream that you have lost a trinket or memento that has some emotional significance, especially as related to another person, this is an indication that you are experiencing some sort of struggle or insecurity in your relationship with this person. If you dream that you have found the trinket you were searching for, this is a sign of future reconciliation and resolution.


mercredi 7 septembre 2016

Lightning strikes, maybe once, maybe twice...

So, you can find me recently talking Songs and Stories with the wonderful blogger Cora Linn of Tea Party Princess - an exciting little pre-YAShot treat for me (getting to talk about my favourite things).  I will be at YAShot speaking on a panel about music in books and I am looking forward to it a ridiculous amount.

Quite fittingly, I spent the weekend in a field listening to Bat for Lashes - among others - for the truly delightful End of The Road festival.  Natasha was definitely a highlight; she was incredible.  As were Joanna Newsom, Cat Power, Devendra Barnhart, Feels, GOAT, Bridget Christie, Josie Long, Jeffrey Lewis, Phosphorescent.... the list goes on and should also really include the silent disco, the woodland library (yes, really - as you can see, it was basically my dream festival), the karaoke bathtub and the raclette stand.

Bat for Lashes did a beautiful cover of this song, which is in my head this morning.

Lightning strikes, maybe once, maybe twice
And it all comes down to you...